As we wait to due patrol corners, but the scribe is not present: 

Matt:  Where are the dues?  Where are the don'ts?

    -Troop meeting July 2024





Matt: Uuuuhg!

Beckett:  What does that mean?

Matt: [your chair] is on my toe!

    -Summer Camp 2024



At the water carnival relay race as Matt hands off the soda to the chugger:

Thomas : Drink it like you're drowning!

    -Summer Camp 2024



Thomas : We are not in Ohio.

    -Summer Camp 2024




There's a rat in there big as a cat!

Randy Pack

    -Climax Cave Trip 2024




The fire is being burnt.

Marc Andrew

    -Yurts   2024



unknown scout: Amish Geometry

    -Webelos Woods Campout 2023



Shawn picks up camp recycle bin, but it's upsidedown so all cans spill out onto the ground.

Cullen: Don't Litter

-Webelos Woods Campout 2023



unknown scout: Javi-Burger!

-Webelos Woods Campout 2023



At the knot tying station:

scout1: Tie a square knot

scout2: Tie a sheep shank

scout tying the knot:  Stop using weird words


-Webelos Woods Campout 2023



unknown scout: There's bear outside my tent!

    -Summer camp 2023




SPL: Count off!
[each scout]: 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,
Jon Jay: mom!
Mom: 8...

--Yorktown 2023




"Flames come out of the cheese"

-Blake , while cooking cheese. 

--Battle of Richmond 2023


If it goes boom, it goes boom.

I used Mild blunt force

"I kissed him very frankly."
-overheard 5 yr old,  --Carter caves.2023



I'm wrapping up my shower in the campground, where they have shower stools for the infirmed.
As I finish dressing I hear a boy & mom talking:
Mom to boy: Just go in an rinse off.
Boy walks over to stall,sees the stool
Boy: Awe,these are grannie showers.
Mom: Just rinse off
Boy turns on shower,then for 5 minutes alI hear is: oooh,ah,oooh,yes,awh.

--Carter caves.2023

Greg: You're supposed to have a mess kit on campouts
Randy: Not if you're coming to a resort like this.
--2023 McKee



As Logan emerges from his tent, still sleepy, dad asks Logan if he's hungry...

Logan: [something incoherent]

Randy: "You're not yourself when you're hangry."

Dad: "He's not really hangry as he is 'hunfused'.  (hungry/confused)

   ---Red River Gorge 2023



While hiking we see Gray's Arch thru the trees.

scout1: Is  that Gray's Arch? 

Hayden: "No, that Grey's Arch with an 'E', not an 'A'.

    --Red River Gorge 2023



"Kids dont carry lighters because they all vape."

    -Kian , Red River Gorge 2023



"We already know most of that stuff."

    -Joey  2022,  hearing the Philmont ranger review ranch safety procedures 



[at the meeting, 2 boys were talking about OA membership]:

boy1: I got OA last year
scoutmaster: I joined in 1974
Joey: jeez how old are you?
scoutmaster: 92
Logan: Really?



[while the troop was walking to dinner], someone said:


"Why are you walking with a stance of dominance?"

    -unknown voice , 2022 Summer camp 


During May 2022 on Philmont prep hike, Andrew fell and hurt his knee backpacking, I asked how he was doing. I could tell it was swollen. He said:

“Well, it hurts to go uphill;
It hurts even more going downhill;
Basically, I am now just like a Scoutmaster.”

--Andrew T,   May 2022 on Philmont prep hike.


[scoutmaster after hike thru the woods] Ok everyone, do a tick check.

James: Hey Matt, you got any ticks?

Matt: No, you?

James: No.

--RRG campout Apr 2022


-summer camp 2020

unknown scout1: Do u have a fart ready?
unknown scout2: Yes I'm gonna fart on Sam.


A scout thru the frisbee and hit his mothers car.  She gives an angry look, then

"A least it cleaned the dust off the car."  -Joey 'Bag o Dounuts'


-2021 Summer camp scouts

"I used the spoonchula."  -Becket cooking food but couldnt find a spatula so instead used a large spoon.   -RRG 2021


"Dr. Veronica..."  -scout talking to Dr. Vranicar  -RRG 2021


"Christmas is canceled"  -Santa Claus to Rudolph, when covid19 hit in 2020


"Get the electric machete."

-Randy P. ,  Adirondack Campout Feb 2020


'Ok, everybody stand in front of the murder house."

-Randy P. ,  Boonesborough Campout 2019


"I didnt give you conscientious invitation."

-Houston ,  Boonesborough Campout 2019


"Why me?"

-Kian   -always getting attacked in Magic The Gathering"  Nov 2019


"They have a housekeeper and her name is Hazel."

-overheard conversation of unknown camper.  Webelos Woods 2019


(while tentmates were taking down their tent) Can we trade out Jeremiah for Gabe?    

-Emerson  2019 Peterloon


When Andrew T. turned in the merit badge worksheet and the councelor asked if he had the book too, Andrew replied, "What book?"     -meeting 2019



" Wow! I have never seen a car with windows that open that way." 

-- said an unnamed Boy Scout from the back of the car, when an adult leader used his manual window cranks. , Red River Gorge 2019


" These hamburgers and hot dogs aren't going to cook themselves."  

-cook James M , Red River Gorge 2019


"My dog likes cat turds , Farm -to- table"




"There's something weird on the internet."    

-10 year old Webelo  Logan  -  2019 Yurt camp



"I dont want to get weirdish."

    -Liam ,  2018 Cloudsplitter trip



"Just go slow fast." 

   -Ben W ,  2018 Cloudsplitter trip



[Preping to go rock climbing]:  

"I'm not emotionally ready."

-Liam ,  2018 Cloudsplitter trip



[Preping to go into the cave]:

Randy: See if your dad needs help.

Jeramiah: I don't have to help him, he's my dad.

2018 Climax Cave trip


[Standing in chow line, scouts are looking at the names on the back of the chairs on the front porch]:

scout: Greg Chase....who's he?

Randy: He's our committee chair.

scout: Is he still alive?

-2018 summer camp

"The Internet, it's a crazy thing."  --Bo   ,  2018 summer camp


"Dog....Return to post!"   

-- Honor Guard Caller,  2018 summer camp when Taco (the dog) was on the field during flag lowering.


"OPEN THE ROPE BOX!"  ---ALL   2016 summer camp


[after giving orders to scouts]:  It's easier when you yell a little bit.    --Liam ,RRG Apr 2018

"No, I'm not even listening to you."  --James M  , RRG Apr 2018

"Body , body."   --various 2016  Peterloon

mom: So, how did u sleep

Scout: Ok, but I don't know about my tent mate.

mom:  Who was your tent mate?

Scout: A wolf spider

        --- unknown  , 2016 summer camp


[kid wakes up, walks over to the crowd]  

"You should pee.  It feels great."    --Gabe   Battle of Richmond 2017

[Caving] is like hiking, only harder.   -Liam   cave trip 2016

I wish people would poop like dogs do.   -webelo scout  2016